dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
