I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
sarcasm needs its own font
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
