Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
