Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
