i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
