How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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