we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize