She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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