how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
