Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
