I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
