dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize