His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
