i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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