we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
