apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
So here I am, sexting at work.
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