I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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