Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You are the jesus of drinking
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
