wanna go halves on a baby?
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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