two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
