went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize