she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
