I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
