I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Randomize
