I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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