You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
