Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize