hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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