im drinking this country out of the recession.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize