That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I deserve this hangover.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
