i just had sex bonerless
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
