so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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