Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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