i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize