I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Of course I have a pirate flag
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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