handjob tips. give me some.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
