We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
