I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I didn't notice because vodka
It's rum buckets o'clock
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Randomize
