I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
