If i come over, it means nothing
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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