wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize
