i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Man, jail baloney is awful.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
