I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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