Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
