So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
