Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
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