is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
