let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
