no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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