I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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