tell your sister to shave her snatch
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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